The Christmas Season is almost beyond us. My family had an interesting experience this year, which brings me to this posting.
My son purchased me a stove for Christmas from a nationally renowned store. He bought it on the 10th of this month and it was scheduled by the store to be delivered to us on the 26th - 16 days after the purchase. The hours of delivery were set from 7 a.m. to 7 p.m.
About 9 o'clock yesterday I decided I needed to contact the store to see if we could get a smaller time frame, just in case I needed to go somewhere during the day. The message I received was that the store was closed. I continued trying, as another of my children called me to say that the parking lot at this store was full. Two hours later I get a message saying that they are having phone difficulties and to dial this extension. Nothing. The extension took me back to the "store is closed" recording.
The son who purchased me the stove for Christmas arrived in my living room at noon, and asked if they'd called me yet. When was the stove supposed to arrive? He tried to call them, and managed to get through.
The message we got was "there are no deliveries today and even though your purchase sheet states that it will be delivered today, it's not going to happen. Someone should have contacted you to reschedule." No apology came from them about the mix up.
Needless to say, my son went to the store to talk to the manager. He maintained his calm until the comment was made "The amount of money you spent here is inconsequential, and you still have to wait for three or four more days for the stove to be delivered." My son returned the stove and went elsewhere.
The point of this story is to say, that the person who each of us is is not inconsequential. It has nothing to do with money, our jobs, where we live or anything else. We are all one. I am you and you are me. I am Spirit, just as you are. A homeless person's worth or value is no less than Bill Gates or any other multi-billionaire. Every person should be treated with respect and dignity.
I understand at times it is difficult to apologize for the inconvenience we may have caused another, but in the long run, we feel better for trying to do the right thing. All that was called for in this instance was "We are so sorry for the misunderstanding. We don't have people doing deliveries today, but if we can put you on the list for the first thing tomorrow morning..." would have been acceptable. The effort is made to right a wrong, instead of intimating that you aren't worthy as a person.
This lesson is a reminder to me that I, too, need to make a conscious effort in how I treat others. If I'm frustrated or angry about something, I will remind myself that they aren't to blame, that they aren't to be treated without that respect they deserve. Because you see, I am you and you are me.
Namaste,
Sue
Monday, December 27, 2010
Saturday, December 4, 2010
ADD/ADHD; ALTERNATIVE TREATMENTS FOR OUR CHILDREN
Over the last couple of months I have kept having recurring thoughts about ADD/ADHD children, so I started studying more and more about the subject. My youngest child was diagnosed with ADHD when he was in the 8th grade, but I never really understood a whole lot about it.
I will admit when Nick was growing up he was a handful. He was wonderfully funny and full of energy, but when it came time for him to do his homework or any chore he may have been asked to fulfill, he would keep disappearing. You would locate him and ask why things weren't completed. The common answer was "I forgot." After a while this became very old, and my husband and I were at our wits end trying to figure out what was going on with him. We had never heard of ADD or ADHD before, so when someone I happened to bump into mentioned it I thought what if this was what was wrong with our son.
We took Nick to see a psychologist who spent 20 minutes with him, and never spoke with my husband or I about what was going on with him. She came out and stated that if he had ADD he would have been diagnosed in kindergarten.
Here our son was in the 8th grade and he'd been labeled behavioral disordered in grade school. He was always in trouble for being "too active", talking too much and generally not listening to the teacher.
We took him to another counselor who specialized in ADD. She spent two hours with us, asking us each a series of questions. Out of 250 points Nick got 189. The prognosis was "I can't say definitely that he's ADD, but it sure looks like it." From there we went to another doctor and Nick was put on Ritalin.
As soon as our son started the drugs we lost our happy go lucky child. He always looked and acted like he was depressed. Oh yes, his grades improved, but he was still getting into trouble as soon as the drugs wore off. So we had to have him receive another dose of Ritalin in the middle of the day. From there we went to Adderall. We did this for four years until he said no more, he wasn't going to take the drugs any longer. He wanted to be "normal" like all the rest of the kids.
Our happy go lucky child was back, but now he'd moved on to "recreational" drugs. Those drugs were just the same type of stimulant that he'd gotten from the doctor's to control the ADHD, only now they were illegal.
My son is grown up now. He holds down a job. He's responsible about getting too and from work on time. He's responsible enough that he's considered one of the best employees. It took a long time for him to get to this point. He dropped out of high school because he just couldn't seem to deal with it. He went through several jobs because he learned to play the "victim" game - I've got ADD, and they aren't being fair to me, or they aren't treating me right.
I've noticed that kids with ADD/ADHD don't seem to mature as fast. What I do know is that these kids are smart. Very smart. What I'm learning is that their self esteem is usually very low. They have been ridiculed by teachers, parents, and their peers over the label that society has given to them.
Their brain works differently from ours. Period. End of story.
From the studies that I have been reading these children don't need to be put on the drugs that keep the pharmaceutical companies happy. They need proper nutrition. They need a higher self esteem. And they need to learn to calm themselves, quiet their minds and completely relax so that they can focus.
As a hypnotherapist I can help them build higher self-esteem, self-confidence, to calm themselves, quiet their minds and completely relax so that they can focus. I can assist them in learning to listen and to wait to speak until it is their turn to speak. I can help them to feel confident enough about who they are so that they can achieve their goals.
These children don't need to be labeled. Their creativity, joyfulness and gift of life does not need to be stifled by drugs that after long term use can really screw up their cognitive thinking and ability to deal with stress.
If you take them off their medication without teaching them how to cope, they haven't healed anything. In fact, you may find their behavior is worse. They are out of control. The healing needs to come from within them. But they need the help of their parents, their families, and the education system.
These children do not deal well with stress. Stress reduces the nutrients in our bodies that can cause symptoms of ADD/ADHD. Proper nutrition and good vitamins will help with this. Sleep deprivation can also produce symptoms of ADD/ADHD. So your child needs a good night's sleep. Plenty of exercise and good nutrition will also add in your child's ability to sleep soundly.
If you are interested in learning more about helping your child cope with the symptoms of ADD/ADHD, or if your child has been labeled ADD/ADHD and you are wanting to try holistic approaches of helping your child away from the drugs, please feel free to contact me for more information.
Our children need a fighting chance. It isn't simpler to give them a pill and call it good. We aren't being fair to our children. We aren't being fair to the generation that will be in charge of this world some day. Give them a chance to remain true to themselves; to stay that happy go lucky child and not become a zombie walking.
Namaste
Sue
Blue Heron Transitions
I will admit when Nick was growing up he was a handful. He was wonderfully funny and full of energy, but when it came time for him to do his homework or any chore he may have been asked to fulfill, he would keep disappearing. You would locate him and ask why things weren't completed. The common answer was "I forgot." After a while this became very old, and my husband and I were at our wits end trying to figure out what was going on with him. We had never heard of ADD or ADHD before, so when someone I happened to bump into mentioned it I thought what if this was what was wrong with our son.
We took Nick to see a psychologist who spent 20 minutes with him, and never spoke with my husband or I about what was going on with him. She came out and stated that if he had ADD he would have been diagnosed in kindergarten.
Here our son was in the 8th grade and he'd been labeled behavioral disordered in grade school. He was always in trouble for being "too active", talking too much and generally not listening to the teacher.
We took him to another counselor who specialized in ADD. She spent two hours with us, asking us each a series of questions. Out of 250 points Nick got 189. The prognosis was "I can't say definitely that he's ADD, but it sure looks like it." From there we went to another doctor and Nick was put on Ritalin.
As soon as our son started the drugs we lost our happy go lucky child. He always looked and acted like he was depressed. Oh yes, his grades improved, but he was still getting into trouble as soon as the drugs wore off. So we had to have him receive another dose of Ritalin in the middle of the day. From there we went to Adderall. We did this for four years until he said no more, he wasn't going to take the drugs any longer. He wanted to be "normal" like all the rest of the kids.
Our happy go lucky child was back, but now he'd moved on to "recreational" drugs. Those drugs were just the same type of stimulant that he'd gotten from the doctor's to control the ADHD, only now they were illegal.
My son is grown up now. He holds down a job. He's responsible about getting too and from work on time. He's responsible enough that he's considered one of the best employees. It took a long time for him to get to this point. He dropped out of high school because he just couldn't seem to deal with it. He went through several jobs because he learned to play the "victim" game - I've got ADD, and they aren't being fair to me, or they aren't treating me right.
I've noticed that kids with ADD/ADHD don't seem to mature as fast. What I do know is that these kids are smart. Very smart. What I'm learning is that their self esteem is usually very low. They have been ridiculed by teachers, parents, and their peers over the label that society has given to them.
Their brain works differently from ours. Period. End of story.
From the studies that I have been reading these children don't need to be put on the drugs that keep the pharmaceutical companies happy. They need proper nutrition. They need a higher self esteem. And they need to learn to calm themselves, quiet their minds and completely relax so that they can focus.
As a hypnotherapist I can help them build higher self-esteem, self-confidence, to calm themselves, quiet their minds and completely relax so that they can focus. I can assist them in learning to listen and to wait to speak until it is their turn to speak. I can help them to feel confident enough about who they are so that they can achieve their goals.
These children don't need to be labeled. Their creativity, joyfulness and gift of life does not need to be stifled by drugs that after long term use can really screw up their cognitive thinking and ability to deal with stress.
If you take them off their medication without teaching them how to cope, they haven't healed anything. In fact, you may find their behavior is worse. They are out of control. The healing needs to come from within them. But they need the help of their parents, their families, and the education system.
These children do not deal well with stress. Stress reduces the nutrients in our bodies that can cause symptoms of ADD/ADHD. Proper nutrition and good vitamins will help with this. Sleep deprivation can also produce symptoms of ADD/ADHD. So your child needs a good night's sleep. Plenty of exercise and good nutrition will also add in your child's ability to sleep soundly.
If you are interested in learning more about helping your child cope with the symptoms of ADD/ADHD, or if your child has been labeled ADD/ADHD and you are wanting to try holistic approaches of helping your child away from the drugs, please feel free to contact me for more information.
Our children need a fighting chance. It isn't simpler to give them a pill and call it good. We aren't being fair to our children. We aren't being fair to the generation that will be in charge of this world some day. Give them a chance to remain true to themselves; to stay that happy go lucky child and not become a zombie walking.
Namaste
Sue
Blue Heron Transitions
Monday, November 8, 2010
Wednesday, November 3, 2010
Could it be a past life?
Do you spend time daydreaming? As a child, I would spend an enormous amount of time daydreaming. In the evening while doing the dishes, I would stare into the window above the sink and it was as if I was transported back in time.
I remember a hill covered with what appeared to be sun-ripened wheat. A young woman, dressed in a long cotton dress with a white bib apron, stood in the middle of the field. She stared down the hill towards a thatch covered cottage.
This memory burned vividly in my brain. As a child, I swore that woman was me. Of course, my parents told me I really had an active imagination, but was it?
Is it possible I was remembering a past life? As a hypnotherapist who specializes in past life regression, I believe it is possible.
Each time we are born, we bring with our soul memories of the past. We don't have any experiences in this life recorded in our unconscious mind, therefore we don't think the same way adults do in terms of imagination.
Has your child told you stories that you are completely amazed at where the information came from? Are you, or your child, focused on items that draw you like magnets? These could be memories from a past life that have come through with you into this life.
Children may talk about their past lives, and they may try to keep living them. They may bring mannerisms, skills and habits with them when they come into this life. Does your child have a "natural" creative ability, excellent rhythm or coordination? Can they do things that you have no idea where they could have learned how to do them?
Children may experience past lives through dreams or nightmares. You may find them trying different skills or games that they uncovered in their dreams. The key to the process is the child's ability to imagine. The more they are allowed to imagine in a positive way, the more clues you will receive as to what they have recalled.
As we grow older, we sometimes close off these thoughts, these memories. Yet, on the other hand, you may collect something that you just can't explain the reason for, you just are attracted to them. They make you feel good, or they strike a cord in your soul.
Have you ever walked into a place and instantly knew you'd been there before, yet you know positively that you were never there in this lifetime. This is called deja vu.
Do you have a mistrust of people, a fear of something that you have no explanation for, or a habit that you can't for the life of you figure out why you developed it? Perhaps you'll find the answer in a past life.
Perhaps you'll find that your best friend, spouse, son or daughter, has been with you for more than this lifetime. Perhaps you'll discover why you really can't stand to wear a turtleneck sweater.
Aren't you just a little bit curious now? I know I am.
Namaste,
Sue
I remember a hill covered with what appeared to be sun-ripened wheat. A young woman, dressed in a long cotton dress with a white bib apron, stood in the middle of the field. She stared down the hill towards a thatch covered cottage.
This memory burned vividly in my brain. As a child, I swore that woman was me. Of course, my parents told me I really had an active imagination, but was it?
Is it possible I was remembering a past life? As a hypnotherapist who specializes in past life regression, I believe it is possible.
Each time we are born, we bring with our soul memories of the past. We don't have any experiences in this life recorded in our unconscious mind, therefore we don't think the same way adults do in terms of imagination.
Has your child told you stories that you are completely amazed at where the information came from? Are you, or your child, focused on items that draw you like magnets? These could be memories from a past life that have come through with you into this life.
Children may talk about their past lives, and they may try to keep living them. They may bring mannerisms, skills and habits with them when they come into this life. Does your child have a "natural" creative ability, excellent rhythm or coordination? Can they do things that you have no idea where they could have learned how to do them?
Children may experience past lives through dreams or nightmares. You may find them trying different skills or games that they uncovered in their dreams. The key to the process is the child's ability to imagine. The more they are allowed to imagine in a positive way, the more clues you will receive as to what they have recalled.
As we grow older, we sometimes close off these thoughts, these memories. Yet, on the other hand, you may collect something that you just can't explain the reason for, you just are attracted to them. They make you feel good, or they strike a cord in your soul.
Have you ever walked into a place and instantly knew you'd been there before, yet you know positively that you were never there in this lifetime. This is called deja vu.
Do you have a mistrust of people, a fear of something that you have no explanation for, or a habit that you can't for the life of you figure out why you developed it? Perhaps you'll find the answer in a past life.
Perhaps you'll find that your best friend, spouse, son or daughter, has been with you for more than this lifetime. Perhaps you'll discover why you really can't stand to wear a turtleneck sweater.
Aren't you just a little bit curious now? I know I am.
Namaste,
Sue
Friday, October 8, 2010
TRUTH VS. EXPECTATIONS
As many of you know I'm working on my master's degree in Holistic Healing. My core classes are all religious studies. The class I'm taking right now is on Spirituality, and the book I'm reading is on Soul Recovery.
As I'm reading and absorbing this information on how to recover my Authentic Self - the Self I was sent into this life with, the Self I had before I donned the masks and costumes that everyone expected me to wear in order to conform to their expectations, I started thinking. This in itself isn't a miracle, I tend to think way too much any way.
I drifted back through my life and tried to remember a time when I was really happy. I mean, down to the tips of your toes happy about everything in your life. I couldn't. I honestly can't remember a time where I was truly happy since I was a small child. I had moments as a child, especially when I was with my cousin, Mike. I could be easy and free. I didn't have to worry about not living up to some sort of standard or expectation from him. No worries about being called names, or being ashamed of where I came from. It was all good.
I want to let that joy and happiness back into my life. That carefree wonder, the attitude that you don't have to worry about living up to anyone else's standards but your own. You can just be.
This made me start questioning how we are to teach our children to remain their own authentic self, yet still abide and live by society's rules and regulations. Children watch their parents as they react to different situations. We all have facial expressions that we carry when we talk about certain things; things that may disgust or anger us. We do not realize that at times we wear those same facial expressions when we look at, or say something about (ie,) what our child may be wearing. Children associate their behavior with the actions and expressions of their parents, teachers, or others that they look upon for guidance. It doesn't take a rocket scientist to figure out that the child may then think that they are thought of as a disgusting person.
How do they react to this? They don that mask and costume that they believe you want them to wear. Or their behavior changes. Then something else happens, another expression, another comment, the child dons another mask and costume to become another character that their teachers expect them to be. Eventually, the authentic self is lost amongst all the masks and costumes. And we start to ask "Who am I? Why can't I please my mom, dad, or teacher? I'm being who they want me to be? I'm really, really trying, but I can't get seem to get it right."
As a parent and grandparent, how do we change this? How do we go about teaching our children to be true to themselves, but yet still behave within the guidelines of society's rules? I still question who I am, who my authentic self is. This is a journey that I'm traveling on, to find the truth of it. Maybe along the way I will come up with the answers to the questions that I am asking.
In today's society we are so busy with our daily routines, running here and there, focusing on our jobs and everything else that needs to get done in order for our days to run smoothly, how often do we sit down with our children and encourage them to pursue the things that interest them? Do we push them to do activities that we were good at when we were children, so therefore, it's in the best interest of our child to do the same activities? How often do we actually sit and listen to our child even if it is an argument, or do we say "I don't want to hear it."? Or "children should be seen and not heard"? This was a favorite one in my family.
To me, this meant I wasn't important enough to say what I thought, or perhaps I was too stupid to have an opinion. Is that the message we want to give our children? How many years does someone have to work through this issue in order to figure out that what they have to say is important, that they are important.
I would like to get your opinion on this? How and what do we need to do as a society, to help our children remain true to their authentic self, instead of donning masks and costumes, yet abide by the rules mandated by our society?
As I'm reading and absorbing this information on how to recover my Authentic Self - the Self I was sent into this life with, the Self I had before I donned the masks and costumes that everyone expected me to wear in order to conform to their expectations, I started thinking. This in itself isn't a miracle, I tend to think way too much any way.
I drifted back through my life and tried to remember a time when I was really happy. I mean, down to the tips of your toes happy about everything in your life. I couldn't. I honestly can't remember a time where I was truly happy since I was a small child. I had moments as a child, especially when I was with my cousin, Mike. I could be easy and free. I didn't have to worry about not living up to some sort of standard or expectation from him. No worries about being called names, or being ashamed of where I came from. It was all good.
I want to let that joy and happiness back into my life. That carefree wonder, the attitude that you don't have to worry about living up to anyone else's standards but your own. You can just be.
This made me start questioning how we are to teach our children to remain their own authentic self, yet still abide and live by society's rules and regulations. Children watch their parents as they react to different situations. We all have facial expressions that we carry when we talk about certain things; things that may disgust or anger us. We do not realize that at times we wear those same facial expressions when we look at, or say something about (ie,) what our child may be wearing. Children associate their behavior with the actions and expressions of their parents, teachers, or others that they look upon for guidance. It doesn't take a rocket scientist to figure out that the child may then think that they are thought of as a disgusting person.
How do they react to this? They don that mask and costume that they believe you want them to wear. Or their behavior changes. Then something else happens, another expression, another comment, the child dons another mask and costume to become another character that their teachers expect them to be. Eventually, the authentic self is lost amongst all the masks and costumes. And we start to ask "Who am I? Why can't I please my mom, dad, or teacher? I'm being who they want me to be? I'm really, really trying, but I can't get seem to get it right."
As a parent and grandparent, how do we change this? How do we go about teaching our children to be true to themselves, but yet still behave within the guidelines of society's rules? I still question who I am, who my authentic self is. This is a journey that I'm traveling on, to find the truth of it. Maybe along the way I will come up with the answers to the questions that I am asking.
In today's society we are so busy with our daily routines, running here and there, focusing on our jobs and everything else that needs to get done in order for our days to run smoothly, how often do we sit down with our children and encourage them to pursue the things that interest them? Do we push them to do activities that we were good at when we were children, so therefore, it's in the best interest of our child to do the same activities? How often do we actually sit and listen to our child even if it is an argument, or do we say "I don't want to hear it."? Or "children should be seen and not heard"? This was a favorite one in my family.
To me, this meant I wasn't important enough to say what I thought, or perhaps I was too stupid to have an opinion. Is that the message we want to give our children? How many years does someone have to work through this issue in order to figure out that what they have to say is important, that they are important.
I would like to get your opinion on this? How and what do we need to do as a society, to help our children remain true to their authentic self, instead of donning masks and costumes, yet abide by the rules mandated by our society?
Tuesday, September 21, 2010
IT ISN'T OKAY
Today I listened to a mother talk about her thirteen year old son and the way he'd tormented a new student at his school. The teacher called him on his behavior and told the boy he needed to apologize. The young lady said, "It's okay, I've been made fun of since the second grade."
I'm here to tell you. It isn't okay. As a slightly older person, I've listened to my children and to my grandchildren (0kay, so I started having kids when I was two), talk about their classmates and friends. I've sat all of them down at one time or another and had a serious talk with them about how they speak of these people, behind their backs and to their faces. It isn't okay to make fun and ridicule them. Unfortunately, children can be very, very cruel. As can many adults.
As parents, teachers, counselors, and mentors to the young people of our world, we must work together to help them understand that words do hurt. They leave a lasting mark upon another child's self-esteem, self-worth, and self-confidence. As adults we must learn that our words impact their impressionable behavior too.
Growing up, we were taught not to fight back, to turn the other cheek when someone teased, called us names, or bullied us. My parents always told me this one: "sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me." Sorry, they lied. Words do hurt, and they will continue to hurt as long as we allow people to treat others with hate-filled, harmful thoughts, words and treatment.
I'm not saying to go out and punch someone in the nose. But to tell the one who caused you the hurt that "it's okay", doesn't cut it. It's time to stand up for yourself and let them know that you are smart, fun to be with, and loyal to your friends.
Perhaps if I'd learned to be honest when someone did or said something to me that caused me harm, my self-esteem wouldn't have ended up in the gutter, taking me a number of years to work up the courage to allow myself to believe that I didn't deserve to be treated in such a way that I allowed myself to feel stupid, unloveable, and a freak. Perhaps if I'd been taught how to let the hurt and anger go, I wouldn't have felt so terrible about myself.
Children are so impressionable. They believe what they are told by their peers, teachers, parents and anyone else that comes along. It is up to us to help all children develop a healthy love and respect for themselves, so that these words don't hurt. As an adult, I have the knowledge and the capability to not allow one persons actions or words to hurt and bring me down. But a child does not have the knowledge that they can choose to let it hurt them, or to let the hurt go, unless we help them understand that they are beautiful, special people, and the one causing them the hurt is missing out on a chance to know them. They have to be taught how to let the hurt go, not just told to let it go.
I've watched many parents treat their children in the same manner, calling them names, telling them they are stupid, stifling their need to grow and learn by talking about their experiences. Instead of helping them, allowing them to grow into healthy, loveable, respectable young people. Isn't it time that we allow the next generation, the next future to stand up and say "It's not okay that you treat me this way. It's hurtful and hateful. I'm a beautiful person and someday you'll want to know me."
I can guarantee the one causing the hurt, be it an adult or a child would not want someone else to cause them that pain. This pain may cause anger; it may cause violence.
For each "it's okay that you hurt me", a little piece of self-esteem, self-confidence, or self-worth breaks off and falls away. For each "it's okay that you are mean and cruel to me", one more piece of anger is added to that wall that's being built to protect their heart.
Have you ever met someone who is angry all of the time? Perhaps you have a bully that lives down the street? Someone who is constantly screaming and yelling at their children? Have you stopped to judge them about their attitude? Have you ever wondered what makes them so angry?
A smile, a warm hello, "how are you, you look wonderful today", may make a little piece of that anger melt away. A hug and kiss to a hurt child, along with a "I love you. You're so smart." can take away the sting of words from a classmate or neighbor. Quality time, loving words, a hug, can brighten anyone's day. A cup of hot chocolate doesn't hurt either.
So from me to you, my friends. I love you. Go make yourself a cup of hot chocolate and give yourself a big hug. You are a special, important person in my world and without you, it would be a sadder place.
Namaste,
Sue
I'm here to tell you. It isn't okay. As a slightly older person, I've listened to my children and to my grandchildren (0kay, so I started having kids when I was two), talk about their classmates and friends. I've sat all of them down at one time or another and had a serious talk with them about how they speak of these people, behind their backs and to their faces. It isn't okay to make fun and ridicule them. Unfortunately, children can be very, very cruel. As can many adults.
As parents, teachers, counselors, and mentors to the young people of our world, we must work together to help them understand that words do hurt. They leave a lasting mark upon another child's self-esteem, self-worth, and self-confidence. As adults we must learn that our words impact their impressionable behavior too.
Growing up, we were taught not to fight back, to turn the other cheek when someone teased, called us names, or bullied us. My parents always told me this one: "sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me." Sorry, they lied. Words do hurt, and they will continue to hurt as long as we allow people to treat others with hate-filled, harmful thoughts, words and treatment.
I'm not saying to go out and punch someone in the nose. But to tell the one who caused you the hurt that "it's okay", doesn't cut it. It's time to stand up for yourself and let them know that you are smart, fun to be with, and loyal to your friends.
Perhaps if I'd learned to be honest when someone did or said something to me that caused me harm, my self-esteem wouldn't have ended up in the gutter, taking me a number of years to work up the courage to allow myself to believe that I didn't deserve to be treated in such a way that I allowed myself to feel stupid, unloveable, and a freak. Perhaps if I'd been taught how to let the hurt and anger go, I wouldn't have felt so terrible about myself.
Children are so impressionable. They believe what they are told by their peers, teachers, parents and anyone else that comes along. It is up to us to help all children develop a healthy love and respect for themselves, so that these words don't hurt. As an adult, I have the knowledge and the capability to not allow one persons actions or words to hurt and bring me down. But a child does not have the knowledge that they can choose to let it hurt them, or to let the hurt go, unless we help them understand that they are beautiful, special people, and the one causing them the hurt is missing out on a chance to know them. They have to be taught how to let the hurt go, not just told to let it go.
I've watched many parents treat their children in the same manner, calling them names, telling them they are stupid, stifling their need to grow and learn by talking about their experiences. Instead of helping them, allowing them to grow into healthy, loveable, respectable young people. Isn't it time that we allow the next generation, the next future to stand up and say "It's not okay that you treat me this way. It's hurtful and hateful. I'm a beautiful person and someday you'll want to know me."
I can guarantee the one causing the hurt, be it an adult or a child would not want someone else to cause them that pain. This pain may cause anger; it may cause violence.
For each "it's okay that you hurt me", a little piece of self-esteem, self-confidence, or self-worth breaks off and falls away. For each "it's okay that you are mean and cruel to me", one more piece of anger is added to that wall that's being built to protect their heart.
Have you ever met someone who is angry all of the time? Perhaps you have a bully that lives down the street? Someone who is constantly screaming and yelling at their children? Have you stopped to judge them about their attitude? Have you ever wondered what makes them so angry?
A smile, a warm hello, "how are you, you look wonderful today", may make a little piece of that anger melt away. A hug and kiss to a hurt child, along with a "I love you. You're so smart." can take away the sting of words from a classmate or neighbor. Quality time, loving words, a hug, can brighten anyone's day. A cup of hot chocolate doesn't hurt either.
So from me to you, my friends. I love you. Go make yourself a cup of hot chocolate and give yourself a big hug. You are a special, important person in my world and without you, it would be a sadder place.
Namaste,
Sue
Wednesday, September 8, 2010
Accepting Others
A deep feeling of sadness overcame me yesterday when I heard a broadcast regarding a church in Gainesville, Floriday setting aside a day to burn the Qu'ran. The question of Why has continued to haunt me.
What is the purpose of burning the Islamic Holy Book? What message do they think this will really send to the Muslims who live in this country, or the people who have sought to follow this spiritual path?
The message being sent is that of fear. The same fear that over thousands of year has led to persecution, torture and murder for allowing others their own beliefs, spiritual or personal. Have we not learned anything over the years?
Yes, I agree 100 percent that September 11 was a horrible day. A day of fear, not just for those who watched, as I did, the death and destruction of thousands of people. Not only those who perished, but the friends and families of the lost. But it was also a day of fear for those who created this mass destruction. They were afraid to allow others their beliefs. These people were fanatics, not of the normal Islamic beliefs.
The best message that we can send to anyone is the message of forgiveness. We will not condone or forget the action, but we can forgive those who caused this terrible mass murder.
If we do not release this pain, and forgive, we will carry this burden around on our shoulders for years to come. We will create dis-ease in our own bodies and minds. This burden will become heavier with each day, and the dis-ease will eat at our souls like the most foul of cancer.
I, for one, welcome my Muslim friends with open arms, along with those who have their own spiritual path to follow. We all are on a path to discover our own spiritual self. Just because their path is different from yours or mine, does not mean that they should have to live in fear, watching over their shoulders for harm to come their way.
As I've spent some time studying other spiritual beliefs, I've come to realize, they aren't that different from each other. Religion is just a word. We're all on the path to reach that same goal. A oneness with our Higher Power.
Violence begets violence. Do we want to become known as terrorists to the Muslim Community? This church is threatening to burn a Holy book, is that not a form of terrorism? You are threatening their beliefs, which is the same thing those terrorists were doing to the United States nine years ago.
Please, let's forgive and accept everyone for who they are and allow them to have their own beliefs.
Namaste, Peace and Blessings
Sue
What is the purpose of burning the Islamic Holy Book? What message do they think this will really send to the Muslims who live in this country, or the people who have sought to follow this spiritual path?
The message being sent is that of fear. The same fear that over thousands of year has led to persecution, torture and murder for allowing others their own beliefs, spiritual or personal. Have we not learned anything over the years?
Yes, I agree 100 percent that September 11 was a horrible day. A day of fear, not just for those who watched, as I did, the death and destruction of thousands of people. Not only those who perished, but the friends and families of the lost. But it was also a day of fear for those who created this mass destruction. They were afraid to allow others their beliefs. These people were fanatics, not of the normal Islamic beliefs.
The best message that we can send to anyone is the message of forgiveness. We will not condone or forget the action, but we can forgive those who caused this terrible mass murder.
If we do not release this pain, and forgive, we will carry this burden around on our shoulders for years to come. We will create dis-ease in our own bodies and minds. This burden will become heavier with each day, and the dis-ease will eat at our souls like the most foul of cancer.
I, for one, welcome my Muslim friends with open arms, along with those who have their own spiritual path to follow. We all are on a path to discover our own spiritual self. Just because their path is different from yours or mine, does not mean that they should have to live in fear, watching over their shoulders for harm to come their way.
As I've spent some time studying other spiritual beliefs, I've come to realize, they aren't that different from each other. Religion is just a word. We're all on the path to reach that same goal. A oneness with our Higher Power.
Violence begets violence. Do we want to become known as terrorists to the Muslim Community? This church is threatening to burn a Holy book, is that not a form of terrorism? You are threatening their beliefs, which is the same thing those terrorists were doing to the United States nine years ago.
Please, let's forgive and accept everyone for who they are and allow them to have their own beliefs.
Namaste, Peace and Blessings
Sue
Monday, August 30, 2010
What Do You See?
My husband passed away last November. Usually that time of year is chilly or cold, but this year it seemed unseasonably warm. Phil died late Saturday night. With a numb mind I made funeral arrangements on Sunday. On Monday, the minister came to the house to help us plan the service. Never having met my husband, he asked our children and me to tell him about their dad, my husband. We laughed and cried over the memories we relayed.
One such story told of Phil's love of joking and playing pranks on people. Knowing the women he worked with feared mice and snakes, he would plant plastic critters in their desk drawer.
He always knew when I discovered a snake in our garden by my dancing around and letting out a hoot. HE thought it was funny. I was trying to get my heart to stop pounding.
After the minister left, I had to do something, anything to keep myself going, so I headed to the kitchen to wipe up the dishes. My daughter-in-law gasped and asked me to look at the stove.
Upon further inspection, I noticed a snake's head barely peeking up over a lid resting on a pile of dishes.
I automatically assumed one of my adult children was playing a prank. I demanded to know which hooligan put a plastic snake on the dirty dishes. It wasn't funny.
"Like we walk around with rubber snakes in our pockets," they stated. "Besides, we were all in the living room with you."
I had to admit they were right on both counts. None of them had left the room. I suspected one of them had discovered Phil's plastic snake. There was only one problem - this snake was alive. Which started a whole new line of questioning. Who went out and brought a snake into the house? Where did they find a snake at this time of year? I hate snakes.
And my husband knew it. My children didn't know I would tell the story of snakes earlier. How could they? I didn't know. what I do know is my husband knew I would see the snake and react. This was a sign from him to me, "Here, I am. Lighten up. I'm okay now. I'm where I'm supposed to be."
My daughter-in-law returned the tiny, ten-inch garter snake to the yard. Two weeks later, another snake appeared in the driveway. This one was a whole lot bigger. A sign I couldn't ignore.
Since then, I've been searching my spiritual path, doing innerwork to help ease my grief so that I can move forward with my life. I've been told time and again to ask for help. Being extremely independent, this is a difficult chore for me.
A few nights later ago I had a dream. After spending time interpreting my dream, I understood I needed to go to my "sisterhood" for help. They are there to help me learn and grow. Tucking that knowledge back into the recesses of my mind, I went on with my day, letting the dream receded into my mind.
Later, sitting at a stoplight, I glanced over at a house surrounded by a wooden privacy fence. Sitting on that fence were two of the largest ravens I've ever seen in my life. The sun glinted off their blue-black wings mesmerizing me. I didn't fail to notice the third raven sitting in the bush next to them, eating its fill of berries.
I couldn't let go of that vision. It meant something to me. It caught my attention and wouldn't let go. Once again my thoughts returned to my "sisters", those who would stand by me and watch over me while I continue to feast on my learning and grow.
Signs appear everywhere around us. We just need to slow down, open ourselves up to a higher power and pay attention. Our souls are talking to us, helping to lead the way.
Listen to that voice in your head that talks to you. Watch the world around you. Nature is calling to you. Pay close attention to your dreams. You'll be surprised what you might learn, just as I was.
Shortly after my dream telling to ask my "sisters" for help, I had another dream. I was walking through a walkway with one of my biological sisters and we bumped into a spider's nest. I was bitten on my big toe, which immediately swelled and turned black.
I could take this dream literally and stop walking around barefoot, especially at night, outdoors. Or I could take it to mean that I haven't been paying attention to what I'm being told. The spider bit me to get my attention. Boy, did it ever. Spiders rank right up there with snakes and mice.
I took the time to break down my dreams, to listen to what I was being told. I need help. There's nothing wrong with asking for it. The "sisterhood" I need to go to understands, ready and willing to catch me when I fall and put me back on my feet again.
Listen. Visualize. Trust. More importantly BELIEVE.
I wrote that article two and a half years ago. The last three years have been filled with amazing things that have happened to me. I still have moments of grief, an ache that doesn't want to seem to ever go away. Yet I've had many dreams of my husband. He seems happy and content where he's at, waiting for me to rejoin him once my time comes.
I've also had many dreams of snakes. They seem to be a constant in my life, consciously and subconsciously. They are the messenger that draws me to the fact that there is something important that I need to pay attention to.
I love nature. Usually when it's this hot, I don't venture outside too much. I prefer the beautiful 70 and 80 degree weather that we had last summer. But when I am outside, or looking through the window, I observe and study what is going on around me. There are signs everywhere that we are able to see that give us messages of hope, joy, and happiness.
The other morning I watched the sunrise. The painter's brush the Universe uses leaves wisps of peach, pink, a soft orange and violet across the sky. The huge gold sphere of sun is split in two by the spire of a church. Rays of brilliance spread from the golden sphere to illuminate the world.
A glorious morning with the sunrise. So soft and subtle it symbolized a mild, peaceful day to me.
The sun being split in two reminded me of something, but I can't quite put my finger upon it. It's almost as if I've seen a twin sun somewhere - possibly in another life.
Is this a sign of things to come? Changes in our world? Positive changes is what I am getting from the twin suns.
I love the sunrise. It symbolizes hope for a new day, the beginning of a new life. Everyday is the start of something new. New lives, new habits, it's fresh, a chance to leave behind whatever is bothering me, so that I may begin again with clear vibrations along my path.
I pray that you see the symbols that surround you. Symbols that mean something to only you. Symbols of hope, joy, happiness. Symbols that help you get through each and every day feeling blessed and loved.
Namaste
Sue
One such story told of Phil's love of joking and playing pranks on people. Knowing the women he worked with feared mice and snakes, he would plant plastic critters in their desk drawer.
He always knew when I discovered a snake in our garden by my dancing around and letting out a hoot. HE thought it was funny. I was trying to get my heart to stop pounding.
After the minister left, I had to do something, anything to keep myself going, so I headed to the kitchen to wipe up the dishes. My daughter-in-law gasped and asked me to look at the stove.
Upon further inspection, I noticed a snake's head barely peeking up over a lid resting on a pile of dishes.
I automatically assumed one of my adult children was playing a prank. I demanded to know which hooligan put a plastic snake on the dirty dishes. It wasn't funny.
"Like we walk around with rubber snakes in our pockets," they stated. "Besides, we were all in the living room with you."
I had to admit they were right on both counts. None of them had left the room. I suspected one of them had discovered Phil's plastic snake. There was only one problem - this snake was alive. Which started a whole new line of questioning. Who went out and brought a snake into the house? Where did they find a snake at this time of year? I hate snakes.
And my husband knew it. My children didn't know I would tell the story of snakes earlier. How could they? I didn't know. what I do know is my husband knew I would see the snake and react. This was a sign from him to me, "Here, I am. Lighten up. I'm okay now. I'm where I'm supposed to be."
My daughter-in-law returned the tiny, ten-inch garter snake to the yard. Two weeks later, another snake appeared in the driveway. This one was a whole lot bigger. A sign I couldn't ignore.
Since then, I've been searching my spiritual path, doing innerwork to help ease my grief so that I can move forward with my life. I've been told time and again to ask for help. Being extremely independent, this is a difficult chore for me.
A few nights later ago I had a dream. After spending time interpreting my dream, I understood I needed to go to my "sisterhood" for help. They are there to help me learn and grow. Tucking that knowledge back into the recesses of my mind, I went on with my day, letting the dream receded into my mind.
Later, sitting at a stoplight, I glanced over at a house surrounded by a wooden privacy fence. Sitting on that fence were two of the largest ravens I've ever seen in my life. The sun glinted off their blue-black wings mesmerizing me. I didn't fail to notice the third raven sitting in the bush next to them, eating its fill of berries.
I couldn't let go of that vision. It meant something to me. It caught my attention and wouldn't let go. Once again my thoughts returned to my "sisters", those who would stand by me and watch over me while I continue to feast on my learning and grow.
Signs appear everywhere around us. We just need to slow down, open ourselves up to a higher power and pay attention. Our souls are talking to us, helping to lead the way.
Listen to that voice in your head that talks to you. Watch the world around you. Nature is calling to you. Pay close attention to your dreams. You'll be surprised what you might learn, just as I was.
Shortly after my dream telling to ask my "sisters" for help, I had another dream. I was walking through a walkway with one of my biological sisters and we bumped into a spider's nest. I was bitten on my big toe, which immediately swelled and turned black.
I could take this dream literally and stop walking around barefoot, especially at night, outdoors. Or I could take it to mean that I haven't been paying attention to what I'm being told. The spider bit me to get my attention. Boy, did it ever. Spiders rank right up there with snakes and mice.
I took the time to break down my dreams, to listen to what I was being told. I need help. There's nothing wrong with asking for it. The "sisterhood" I need to go to understands, ready and willing to catch me when I fall and put me back on my feet again.
Listen. Visualize. Trust. More importantly BELIEVE.
I wrote that article two and a half years ago. The last three years have been filled with amazing things that have happened to me. I still have moments of grief, an ache that doesn't want to seem to ever go away. Yet I've had many dreams of my husband. He seems happy and content where he's at, waiting for me to rejoin him once my time comes.
I've also had many dreams of snakes. They seem to be a constant in my life, consciously and subconsciously. They are the messenger that draws me to the fact that there is something important that I need to pay attention to.
I love nature. Usually when it's this hot, I don't venture outside too much. I prefer the beautiful 70 and 80 degree weather that we had last summer. But when I am outside, or looking through the window, I observe and study what is going on around me. There are signs everywhere that we are able to see that give us messages of hope, joy, and happiness.
The other morning I watched the sunrise. The painter's brush the Universe uses leaves wisps of peach, pink, a soft orange and violet across the sky. The huge gold sphere of sun is split in two by the spire of a church. Rays of brilliance spread from the golden sphere to illuminate the world.
A glorious morning with the sunrise. So soft and subtle it symbolized a mild, peaceful day to me.
The sun being split in two reminded me of something, but I can't quite put my finger upon it. It's almost as if I've seen a twin sun somewhere - possibly in another life.
Is this a sign of things to come? Changes in our world? Positive changes is what I am getting from the twin suns.
I love the sunrise. It symbolizes hope for a new day, the beginning of a new life. Everyday is the start of something new. New lives, new habits, it's fresh, a chance to leave behind whatever is bothering me, so that I may begin again with clear vibrations along my path.
I pray that you see the symbols that surround you. Symbols that mean something to only you. Symbols of hope, joy, happiness. Symbols that help you get through each and every day feeling blessed and loved.
Namaste
Sue
Tuesday, August 3, 2010
The love of a mother
Life comes at us in mysterious ways. Ways that we don't expect them to happen. sometimes they are tremendous blows of grief and pain. and you are left asking why. Most times those answers aren't available for us to see. It takes time for the emotions to clear so that we are able to "see" the overall picture.
I received a phone call a few days ago from a loved one. Grief and pain ripped through her voice when she told me the child she'd given up for adoption twenty-seven years ago had died during the night.
Sitting with her later on the question arose, "Did I do the right thing by giving her up?"
Putting your child up for adoption has to be one of the most difficult decisions a mother can make. Knowing you are unable to financially, physically or emotionally take care of the smallest of innocent creatures is a devastating blow to your soul. Being gracious enough to allow someone else to love, nurture and raise your child is an incredible gift.
This woman gave her baby girl to a couple through an open adoption. The child grew up knowing this woman as a family friend and later knew that she was her biological mother. Even as a teenager the child came to live with her bio mom for a short time.
This little girl was blessed with two mothers who loved her. They were all blessed with the gift of life and the giving of life.
Now these two mothers wil lean on each other for comfort, each giving, each taking what is needed to help themselves get through this difficult time.
This young woman was also a mother. Two young children are left behind. Thankfully there are two grandmothers to help.
After growing ill last fall, this young woman had surgery to correct the problem. Unfortuanately, the problem grew worse instead of better, and she left this earth to move gracefully through the heavens.
I know this is small comfort to the mothers, children, and other family left behind, but sometimes it's all we can offer. Words alone cannot express our sorrow for the loss of a life no matter the age. It's particulary hard when it's a young person.
This young lady brought life, love, laughter, joy, and I'm sure, a variety of exasperation, as any child will do, into the lives of two separate women. The woman who carried her for nine months and the woman who nurtured and raised her.
She also carried on that same love with the birth of her own children. As these women try to comfort their grandchildren, they too, may find comfort in the small smiles, or actions that bring back the memories of days past.
Is there a lesson in all of this? A bigger picture to see? I can't see all of it yet, but as time begins to heal the pain, the grief, perhaps I will be allowed to watch more of the "story" unfold. As of now, I can only see the beginning and the middle of the story. The rest is up to these women as they sift through their memories, their emotions, and their grief. Only then will the rest unfold.
I received a phone call a few days ago from a loved one. Grief and pain ripped through her voice when she told me the child she'd given up for adoption twenty-seven years ago had died during the night.
Sitting with her later on the question arose, "Did I do the right thing by giving her up?"
Putting your child up for adoption has to be one of the most difficult decisions a mother can make. Knowing you are unable to financially, physically or emotionally take care of the smallest of innocent creatures is a devastating blow to your soul. Being gracious enough to allow someone else to love, nurture and raise your child is an incredible gift.
This woman gave her baby girl to a couple through an open adoption. The child grew up knowing this woman as a family friend and later knew that she was her biological mother. Even as a teenager the child came to live with her bio mom for a short time.
This little girl was blessed with two mothers who loved her. They were all blessed with the gift of life and the giving of life.
Now these two mothers wil lean on each other for comfort, each giving, each taking what is needed to help themselves get through this difficult time.
This young woman was also a mother. Two young children are left behind. Thankfully there are two grandmothers to help.
After growing ill last fall, this young woman had surgery to correct the problem. Unfortuanately, the problem grew worse instead of better, and she left this earth to move gracefully through the heavens.
I know this is small comfort to the mothers, children, and other family left behind, but sometimes it's all we can offer. Words alone cannot express our sorrow for the loss of a life no matter the age. It's particulary hard when it's a young person.
This young lady brought life, love, laughter, joy, and I'm sure, a variety of exasperation, as any child will do, into the lives of two separate women. The woman who carried her for nine months and the woman who nurtured and raised her.
She also carried on that same love with the birth of her own children. As these women try to comfort their grandchildren, they too, may find comfort in the small smiles, or actions that bring back the memories of days past.
Is there a lesson in all of this? A bigger picture to see? I can't see all of it yet, but as time begins to heal the pain, the grief, perhaps I will be allowed to watch more of the "story" unfold. As of now, I can only see the beginning and the middle of the story. The rest is up to these women as they sift through their memories, their emotions, and their grief. Only then will the rest unfold.
Thursday, July 29, 2010
Sunday, July 18, 2010
Time waits for no one
I have days when I am certain there aren't enough hours to accomplish everything that I want to do. I push and push in order to get done what I can so that I can start all over the next day, so that I end up working 13 -14 hours each day in an office setting. On Saturday, I continue to work for another 5 hours in the office. This is a lot of office time! When I'm home, I'm studying, continuing with my learning, working my own spiritual path, or household duties.
I'm not complaining, mind you, I love what I'm doing. When I'm doing my work, it's like everything in the world makes perfect sense. Helping others to help themselves, to heal their wounds and move forward; to discover who they are, or who they want to be; to help remove the negative and replace with the positive.
I'm just like everyone else though. Caught up in day to day activities, working a full time job, taking care of my household, spending time with my grandchildren and children, and any outside activities that I am involved in.
I just wonder where all the time goes, are the days actually becoming shorter and shorter, or am I just so caught up in what I'm doing, that time just disappears without me being aware of where I am, or what is going on around me?
Life isn't just supposed to be about work, or play, or love, friendship, family, solitude. Not individually anyway. It's about balancing all of these things in our day to day activities. Giving completely and totally to what you are doing at the time, before moving to the next event. This goes back to giving 100% of yourself in everything or to everyone, including yourself.
I'm finding that there are things I want to do, but I also hear that voice in my head, "I don't have time today to do this, so I'll wait until tomorrow."
Which all ties into something else that I've been thinking about for the last week. Becoming so busy that you wait to do something, to say something, often leads to guilt, heartbreak, anger, confusion. More often with yourself, rather than with another person.
How often do you not say "I love you" to your children, spouse, parents, partner, or any loved one, believing that you will see them later on that day, or tomorrow? You're in a rush to get to a meeting, or to catch the bus, whatever the reason. It only takes a second to add those three words.
When my husband was ill I got in the habit of telling him I loved him several times during the day. I often worried that he'd pass on not knowing how I felt. Now, I continue this practice whenever I speak to my children on the phone or in person, I always end with "I love you." I try to do this with my sisters, and my other loved ones. I want them to know how much I do love and care for them. I never want there to be any doubt of my feelings for them.
If I continue to say "one of these days I'll...." perhaps I'll never get those things done. This is part of giving to yourself, showing yourself that you are worthy of having these things. There is an abundance for you and everyone else in this world. Isn't your partner, your children, your loved ones worthy of having you do those things with them or hearing those little words? Isn't this one way of showing them, letting them know what they mean to you?
Time disappears and we don't know where it went. As I was reminded just last week, our loved ones leave this world and we start to think "If only I'd..." We can't change things anymore for those who've left us, but we can start today to change things for those who are still amongst us.
If you haven't hugged those people you love and care about most in the world or said those three magical words today, take a couple of minutes from your busy schedule and do so.
Time isn't standing still.
I'm not complaining, mind you, I love what I'm doing. When I'm doing my work, it's like everything in the world makes perfect sense. Helping others to help themselves, to heal their wounds and move forward; to discover who they are, or who they want to be; to help remove the negative and replace with the positive.
I'm just like everyone else though. Caught up in day to day activities, working a full time job, taking care of my household, spending time with my grandchildren and children, and any outside activities that I am involved in.
I just wonder where all the time goes, are the days actually becoming shorter and shorter, or am I just so caught up in what I'm doing, that time just disappears without me being aware of where I am, or what is going on around me?
Life isn't just supposed to be about work, or play, or love, friendship, family, solitude. Not individually anyway. It's about balancing all of these things in our day to day activities. Giving completely and totally to what you are doing at the time, before moving to the next event. This goes back to giving 100% of yourself in everything or to everyone, including yourself.
I'm finding that there are things I want to do, but I also hear that voice in my head, "I don't have time today to do this, so I'll wait until tomorrow."
Which all ties into something else that I've been thinking about for the last week. Becoming so busy that you wait to do something, to say something, often leads to guilt, heartbreak, anger, confusion. More often with yourself, rather than with another person.
How often do you not say "I love you" to your children, spouse, parents, partner, or any loved one, believing that you will see them later on that day, or tomorrow? You're in a rush to get to a meeting, or to catch the bus, whatever the reason. It only takes a second to add those three words.
When my husband was ill I got in the habit of telling him I loved him several times during the day. I often worried that he'd pass on not knowing how I felt. Now, I continue this practice whenever I speak to my children on the phone or in person, I always end with "I love you." I try to do this with my sisters, and my other loved ones. I want them to know how much I do love and care for them. I never want there to be any doubt of my feelings for them.
If I continue to say "one of these days I'll...." perhaps I'll never get those things done. This is part of giving to yourself, showing yourself that you are worthy of having these things. There is an abundance for you and everyone else in this world. Isn't your partner, your children, your loved ones worthy of having you do those things with them or hearing those little words? Isn't this one way of showing them, letting them know what they mean to you?
Time disappears and we don't know where it went. As I was reminded just last week, our loved ones leave this world and we start to think "If only I'd..." We can't change things anymore for those who've left us, but we can start today to change things for those who are still amongst us.
If you haven't hugged those people you love and care about most in the world or said those three magical words today, take a couple of minutes from your busy schedule and do so.
Time isn't standing still.
Monday, June 28, 2010
The Unknown
Here I am in the third week of starting Blue Heron Transitions. I'm still a little at a loss, going to an office where I don't have any clients as of yet. I say yet, because I've been working diligently on my marketing, mailing out letters and brochures to my friends letting them know I've finally taken that big scary step into the unknown. I've taught a couple of classes, and have another class set up.
I've mailed out letters and brochures to a few doctors, chiropractors, and counselors that I've met along the way, hoping they will refer me to patients that have asked about or need what I offer.
And I mailed letters and brochures to bridal shops and photographers. I can see it now, you're gaping at the screen saying "WHAT?"
I did a relaxation, hypnosis on my future niece two years ago to help relieve the stress that occurs when you are planning a wedding. Every little thing that could go wrong, does go wrong, creating more stress and anxiety in your life, until, at times, you become a bit unbearable to live with. So I helped her out. We did a session - one session- and I made a cd of that session so that she could listen to it if she started feeling the least bit anxious or stressed out.
For the next few weeks Sally listened to it off and on until the big day arrived. A few things happened along the way, but she kept cool and calm, taking everything in stride. The day of the wedding, she was serene and very calm. She completely enjoyed her own wedding without becoming a basket case.
For her to take what I offered as a gift, and allow me to hypnotize her was a step into the unknown. She took a leap of faith into an area that she didn't know much about and let it work for her, creating a happy ending.
For me writing letters, making up my brochure and mailing them out is easy. I'm comfortable with doing the clerical aspect of setting up my business. Marketing - making cold calls to introduce myself and promote my business is not comfortable to me. This is my unknown. Yet, I'm willing to work on the discomfort, and turn this discomfort into a positive for me. If I can make those calls, go out and introduce myself face to face to the people I've already mailed brochures to, then I can pretty much do anything.
Or, I can hide in my empty office and hope that people will come calling. This may work, but then again, maybe it won't.
We all have things we're afraid of doing, or even trying because we don't know what may happen, how it will all work out in the end. If you're anything like me you have a vivid imagination and can visualize at least twenty horrifying scenarios that would curl your hair.
What I propose that each of us do is to pick one of those things that we are afraid to step toward and write out a list of ten things that bother you about going after this desire. Things that you visualize going wrong, or make the job harder to do. Number one is the least difficult to do and number ten, of course, is the most difficult. This is the one that really gets the stomach churning.
Now, let's start with number one. This is the least worrisome of the lot, but yet you may feel it's an obstacle to get past to reach that goal that you want to achieve. Sit back, relax and close your eyes. Imagine or visualize that you are completely involved in this action. You are actively participating in whatever scenario you have that has created this obstacle for you. But as you are visualizing the scene, you visualize it turning out exactly as you want it to be. Go through this visualization several times until you've taken it from being an obstacle to a minor challenge.
Then move on to item number two, and repeat this exercise. You are desensitizing yourself to the unknown, the things you imagine could happen to prevent you from achieving your desires. You are making them manageable challenges that will spur you along on your path to success.
This exercise can be used for anything that you want to become easier in your life, your job, a relationship, even just wanting/saving for something that is important to you. Or possibly something you've always wanted to try, like skydiving, or scuba diving.
Now me, I know I can talk to people, selling myself is a bit more difficult, so for now I'm going to sit back, relax, close my eyes, and imagine....
Namaste,
Sue
I've mailed out letters and brochures to a few doctors, chiropractors, and counselors that I've met along the way, hoping they will refer me to patients that have asked about or need what I offer.
And I mailed letters and brochures to bridal shops and photographers. I can see it now, you're gaping at the screen saying "WHAT?"
I did a relaxation, hypnosis on my future niece two years ago to help relieve the stress that occurs when you are planning a wedding. Every little thing that could go wrong, does go wrong, creating more stress and anxiety in your life, until, at times, you become a bit unbearable to live with. So I helped her out. We did a session - one session- and I made a cd of that session so that she could listen to it if she started feeling the least bit anxious or stressed out.
For the next few weeks Sally listened to it off and on until the big day arrived. A few things happened along the way, but she kept cool and calm, taking everything in stride. The day of the wedding, she was serene and very calm. She completely enjoyed her own wedding without becoming a basket case.
For her to take what I offered as a gift, and allow me to hypnotize her was a step into the unknown. She took a leap of faith into an area that she didn't know much about and let it work for her, creating a happy ending.
For me writing letters, making up my brochure and mailing them out is easy. I'm comfortable with doing the clerical aspect of setting up my business. Marketing - making cold calls to introduce myself and promote my business is not comfortable to me. This is my unknown. Yet, I'm willing to work on the discomfort, and turn this discomfort into a positive for me. If I can make those calls, go out and introduce myself face to face to the people I've already mailed brochures to, then I can pretty much do anything.
Or, I can hide in my empty office and hope that people will come calling. This may work, but then again, maybe it won't.
We all have things we're afraid of doing, or even trying because we don't know what may happen, how it will all work out in the end. If you're anything like me you have a vivid imagination and can visualize at least twenty horrifying scenarios that would curl your hair.
What I propose that each of us do is to pick one of those things that we are afraid to step toward and write out a list of ten things that bother you about going after this desire. Things that you visualize going wrong, or make the job harder to do. Number one is the least difficult to do and number ten, of course, is the most difficult. This is the one that really gets the stomach churning.
Now, let's start with number one. This is the least worrisome of the lot, but yet you may feel it's an obstacle to get past to reach that goal that you want to achieve. Sit back, relax and close your eyes. Imagine or visualize that you are completely involved in this action. You are actively participating in whatever scenario you have that has created this obstacle for you. But as you are visualizing the scene, you visualize it turning out exactly as you want it to be. Go through this visualization several times until you've taken it from being an obstacle to a minor challenge.
Then move on to item number two, and repeat this exercise. You are desensitizing yourself to the unknown, the things you imagine could happen to prevent you from achieving your desires. You are making them manageable challenges that will spur you along on your path to success.
This exercise can be used for anything that you want to become easier in your life, your job, a relationship, even just wanting/saving for something that is important to you. Or possibly something you've always wanted to try, like skydiving, or scuba diving.
Now me, I know I can talk to people, selling myself is a bit more difficult, so for now I'm going to sit back, relax, close my eyes, and imagine....
Namaste,
Sue
Monday, June 14, 2010
Giving 100%
Wow, these last couple of weeks have been a whirlwind of activity. I have been working hard to get my office open so that I have a place to see my clients. After working eight hour days at one office, I've been putting in 3-4 hours a night getting the new office ready. I think it's time to slow down and take a deep breath.
We are always in such a rush to get here, go there, get this done, then that done, that we don't take the time to take care of ourselves, or to notice the disappointed look on a child's face when we tell them we don't have time right now. Life is too short to not pay attention to what is going on around us, to enjoy the moment.
We only get this moment once, it will never be exactly the same again. So, why don't we sit back, close our eyes, take a couple of deep breaths and relax. Enjoy the music in the air, it's all around us. The fragrance of fresh cut grass, or the roses blooming on the fence. The sound of rain on the roof - yes, I know we've had a lot of it lately, or the sun on our faces. The feel of a tiny hand in yours, feeling safe, secure and loved.
When you are at work give 100% of yourself to your job, but when you are at home give 100% of yourself to your spouse, your lover, your children. The same goes for when you are with friends and extended family. And when you have down time to relax, do just that. Give 100% of yourself to relaxation. You will be surprised how beneficial it is in the long run.
For me, it's time to give 100% to myself, so I'm going to go find someplace quiet and meditate on everything wonderful that I've experienced with all of my senses today.
Namaste,
Sue
We are always in such a rush to get here, go there, get this done, then that done, that we don't take the time to take care of ourselves, or to notice the disappointed look on a child's face when we tell them we don't have time right now. Life is too short to not pay attention to what is going on around us, to enjoy the moment.
We only get this moment once, it will never be exactly the same again. So, why don't we sit back, close our eyes, take a couple of deep breaths and relax. Enjoy the music in the air, it's all around us. The fragrance of fresh cut grass, or the roses blooming on the fence. The sound of rain on the roof - yes, I know we've had a lot of it lately, or the sun on our faces. The feel of a tiny hand in yours, feeling safe, secure and loved.
When you are at work give 100% of yourself to your job, but when you are at home give 100% of yourself to your spouse, your lover, your children. The same goes for when you are with friends and extended family. And when you have down time to relax, do just that. Give 100% of yourself to relaxation. You will be surprised how beneficial it is in the long run.
For me, it's time to give 100% to myself, so I'm going to go find someplace quiet and meditate on everything wonderful that I've experienced with all of my senses today.
Namaste,
Sue
Friday, June 4, 2010
Did you ever wonder?
It seems just like yesterday that I held my daughter, Shena, in my arms. Tomorrow, her oldest child, Aimee, will graduate from high school. Where do the years go? They've flown by with all the twists and turns of every day living. All the ups and downs of our lives.
What have we done with those twists, turns, ups and downs? Hopefully we've used to them to help ourselves grow, searching for the meaning of our lives. The mystery of what makes us tick. The purpose we were brought here on earth. To find our soul. To grow and learn, and perhaps help others grow and learn.
For many years I worried and fretted. Why was I brought here? It had to be for some reason, for some purpose. I knew it deep inside of me, I just couldn't figure out what it was. Was I put here just to be a mother? If so, then why did I feel like a part of me was missing? What did I need to do to figure that out?
I started following the things that interested me. Things that had held my interest for years. As I searched out one thing, another link would just pop up out of nowhere, until I started accumulating all of these books, and meeting others who were just as curious and interested as I was. Coincidence, you might think.
No, there isn't any such thing as coincidence. All things happen for a reason, I believe. And I can sit back and look at all of these little "happenings" and say, "ah hah, that's why that happened." or "Wow, look at that."
I'm not done searching yet. I still want to know the truth, the reason, the purpose for my life. I look back and realize I'm a little closer than I was a few years ago. I know I'm a little closer than I was yesterday
Who am I? I can probably tell you what I am alot easier than I can tell you who I am. But one thing I've come to realize. I AM me. For whatever that is worth, I AM ME.
As for my daughter and granddaughter, I'm sure they are searching too. Maybe once my daughter's children are grown and living on their own, she will find herself staring out the window wondering who she is, what her purpose in life is all about.
Perhaps, she's already wondering. Maybe Aimee is wondering too. They'll find their path,just as one day I hope I truly recognize mine, and I know they will live it to the fullest of their ability.
Congratulations, my first born's eldest. You make me proud.
Namaste,
Sue
What have we done with those twists, turns, ups and downs? Hopefully we've used to them to help ourselves grow, searching for the meaning of our lives. The mystery of what makes us tick. The purpose we were brought here on earth. To find our soul. To grow and learn, and perhaps help others grow and learn.
For many years I worried and fretted. Why was I brought here? It had to be for some reason, for some purpose. I knew it deep inside of me, I just couldn't figure out what it was. Was I put here just to be a mother? If so, then why did I feel like a part of me was missing? What did I need to do to figure that out?
I started following the things that interested me. Things that had held my interest for years. As I searched out one thing, another link would just pop up out of nowhere, until I started accumulating all of these books, and meeting others who were just as curious and interested as I was. Coincidence, you might think.
No, there isn't any such thing as coincidence. All things happen for a reason, I believe. And I can sit back and look at all of these little "happenings" and say, "ah hah, that's why that happened." or "Wow, look at that."
I'm not done searching yet. I still want to know the truth, the reason, the purpose for my life. I look back and realize I'm a little closer than I was a few years ago. I know I'm a little closer than I was yesterday
Who am I? I can probably tell you what I am alot easier than I can tell you who I am. But one thing I've come to realize. I AM me. For whatever that is worth, I AM ME.
As for my daughter and granddaughter, I'm sure they are searching too. Maybe once my daughter's children are grown and living on their own, she will find herself staring out the window wondering who she is, what her purpose in life is all about.
Perhaps, she's already wondering. Maybe Aimee is wondering too. They'll find their path,just as one day I hope I truly recognize mine, and I know they will live it to the fullest of their ability.
Congratulations, my first born's eldest. You make me proud.
Namaste,
Sue
Saturday, May 29, 2010
Greetings
Greetings from Blue Heron Transitions.
I'd like to introduce myself. My name is Sue Thornton. I am currently setting up my office as a hypnotherapist, Reiki Practioner, and Spiritual counselor.
This has been an interesting experience for me, going back to school at middle age, following a career path that I didn't have any idea I would lean toward until three years ago.
It has been kind of fun knowing that I'm in college as are two of my children. If we all were to attend the same school, I'm not certain how much fun this would be for them, but I've given myself a couple of pats on the back for challenging myself to restart my career.
I'd like to give you a bit of an idea of what gave me reason to start this change in my life. Three years ago my husband was diagnosed with liver cancer. We thought we'd have a good chance of getting a liver transplant, but as fate would have it, he didn't survive. At the time, I would look to the doctors for advice on what foods to feed him, and what I could do for him. Something to help him through the days. I was very discouraged when I received the answers I did. "Feed him whatever he wants. If he wants to eat all fried foods, then feed them to him." I learned quickly that they didn't have any hope that he would recover.
After his death, I was upset and angry with myself for not doing more. There had to be more than just the drugs and endless doctor visits and hospital stays.
Searching for my own spiritual path and purpose for being put on this earth, and an answer to what more could I have done for my husband, I went back to school, a Holistic college. And from there I moved into hypnosis and Reiki. I believe we all play a big part in healing our own bodies and lives. Our doctors play a huge part in our lives, perhaps they, too, would like as much help as we can give them.
So I'm here to assist you, your doctors, or someone else you may know that needs a helping hand. I can't heal you, I am just the channel to open the doors for you so you may heal yourself. It may not be from dis-ease, but a problem you just can't seem to figure out the answer to, or the fear of an upcoming surgery, weight-loss, or needing a helping hand with smoking cessation.
I love doing Reiki treatments, clearing out the negative energy that we attract to ourselves during our hectic schedules. Or if you just want to learn to relax, and reduce your stress, I'm here to help you.
Namaste,
Sue
I'd like to introduce myself. My name is Sue Thornton. I am currently setting up my office as a hypnotherapist, Reiki Practioner, and Spiritual counselor.
This has been an interesting experience for me, going back to school at middle age, following a career path that I didn't have any idea I would lean toward until three years ago.
It has been kind of fun knowing that I'm in college as are two of my children. If we all were to attend the same school, I'm not certain how much fun this would be for them, but I've given myself a couple of pats on the back for challenging myself to restart my career.
I'd like to give you a bit of an idea of what gave me reason to start this change in my life. Three years ago my husband was diagnosed with liver cancer. We thought we'd have a good chance of getting a liver transplant, but as fate would have it, he didn't survive. At the time, I would look to the doctors for advice on what foods to feed him, and what I could do for him. Something to help him through the days. I was very discouraged when I received the answers I did. "Feed him whatever he wants. If he wants to eat all fried foods, then feed them to him." I learned quickly that they didn't have any hope that he would recover.
After his death, I was upset and angry with myself for not doing more. There had to be more than just the drugs and endless doctor visits and hospital stays.
Searching for my own spiritual path and purpose for being put on this earth, and an answer to what more could I have done for my husband, I went back to school, a Holistic college. And from there I moved into hypnosis and Reiki. I believe we all play a big part in healing our own bodies and lives. Our doctors play a huge part in our lives, perhaps they, too, would like as much help as we can give them.
So I'm here to assist you, your doctors, or someone else you may know that needs a helping hand. I can't heal you, I am just the channel to open the doors for you so you may heal yourself. It may not be from dis-ease, but a problem you just can't seem to figure out the answer to, or the fear of an upcoming surgery, weight-loss, or needing a helping hand with smoking cessation.
I love doing Reiki treatments, clearing out the negative energy that we attract to ourselves during our hectic schedules. Or if you just want to learn to relax, and reduce your stress, I'm here to help you.
Namaste,
Sue
Friday, May 28, 2010
Just Imagine
Sometimes our days are very hectic. We’re running here and there, trying to cross off each and every job that needs to be completed off the list we compile each morning. Sometimes there just aren’t enough hours or minutes in the day to complete all of our projects. Have you taken time for yourself today? Do you feel the need to relax, release some stress, calm your frantic mind? There isn’t any time to do this? Well, take fifteen minutes from your whirlwind schedule and let’s relax. Find a comfortable seat, or perhaps it’s once you slide into your car before you head off for the next chore on your list. Don’t put the key in the ignition, just lean your head back and breathe deep. I’m going to give you an exercise to help you along with your day.
Exercise #1
Take a minute or two, sit back and relax. Focus on your breathing. Inhale deep through your nose, then let it out slowly through your mouth. On the third deep breath, let your eyes drift shut. Imagine, just imagine that you are going someplace you’ve always wanted to go, or perhaps returning to that place you fell in love with at one point in your life. Picture this place in your mind’s eye. What do you smell? Do you remember the wonderful aromas that you encountered while you were there? Look around. What do you see? What do you hear? Are you able to feel the sand, the grass, the trees, the air upon your face? What emotion comes to you while you’re in your special place? Is there someone special there with you? Can you see them? Hear them? Feel them? Smell them? This is your special place. A place where you are safe and secure. A place where you can come to relax, to find yourself, to rejoin your inner you. You can sit, stand or wander around for as long as you like. If you use this exercise every day for ten or fifteen minutes, it’s a great stress reliever.
Exercise #2 is one to use if you are feeling a bit out of sorts, a little lost or troubled.
Now, imagine you are walking along a wooded path, going deep into a forest. You are secure and comfortable in these woods. Visualize or imagine a bowl that you are carrying in your hands. You’ve been along this path many times before, but this time you will meet three others, people or creatures, beings, possibly out of fairy tales, history, mythology, whoever or whatever you’ve always wanted to meet. You will meet each of these three, one at a time. When each one places something into your bowl, they will tell you why they have given it to you. You will also ask each one, “Why have you come?”
Describe in detail the bowl that you carry. What is it made of?
Describe the first being or creature. Why did it come? What does it give you? Why did it give you what it did?
Continue walking and describing your journey through the woods.
Describe the second being or creature. Why did it come? What does it put in your bowl? For what reason.
And the third? Why is it there? What does it give you and why?
After you have received all of your gifts, you will wander to a fallen tree and sit. As you gaze at your gifts, these symbols and what you have been told by the giver, do these have any meaning for you regarding something that has or is happening in your life right now? Describe how these gifts can be applied to your life in the present.
Take a deep breath in and slowly release it. Another and another, opening your eyes on the third exhale. How will you apply this new knowledge to your life’s journey.
This exercise may be one that you want to jot down what or who you meet and the gift they’ve given you along with the reason and meaning. It will add a little food for thought when you have a few spare minutes to meditate on what you sensed.
Sue Thornton
Owner, Blue Heron Transitions
YOU CAN CO-CREATE YOUR OWN CIRCUMSTANCES
WORKING TOGETHER TO LEARN HOW TO FOLLOW YOUR OWN UNIIQUE WISDOM AND PATH OF SELF-DETERMINATION
eMail: Thorntonsue.sue@gmail.com
Telephone: (402) 202-8303
Exercise #1
Take a minute or two, sit back and relax. Focus on your breathing. Inhale deep through your nose, then let it out slowly through your mouth. On the third deep breath, let your eyes drift shut. Imagine, just imagine that you are going someplace you’ve always wanted to go, or perhaps returning to that place you fell in love with at one point in your life. Picture this place in your mind’s eye. What do you smell? Do you remember the wonderful aromas that you encountered while you were there? Look around. What do you see? What do you hear? Are you able to feel the sand, the grass, the trees, the air upon your face? What emotion comes to you while you’re in your special place? Is there someone special there with you? Can you see them? Hear them? Feel them? Smell them? This is your special place. A place where you are safe and secure. A place where you can come to relax, to find yourself, to rejoin your inner you. You can sit, stand or wander around for as long as you like. If you use this exercise every day for ten or fifteen minutes, it’s a great stress reliever.
Exercise #2 is one to use if you are feeling a bit out of sorts, a little lost or troubled.
Now, imagine you are walking along a wooded path, going deep into a forest. You are secure and comfortable in these woods. Visualize or imagine a bowl that you are carrying in your hands. You’ve been along this path many times before, but this time you will meet three others, people or creatures, beings, possibly out of fairy tales, history, mythology, whoever or whatever you’ve always wanted to meet. You will meet each of these three, one at a time. When each one places something into your bowl, they will tell you why they have given it to you. You will also ask each one, “Why have you come?”
Describe in detail the bowl that you carry. What is it made of?
Describe the first being or creature. Why did it come? What does it give you? Why did it give you what it did?
Continue walking and describing your journey through the woods.
Describe the second being or creature. Why did it come? What does it put in your bowl? For what reason.
And the third? Why is it there? What does it give you and why?
After you have received all of your gifts, you will wander to a fallen tree and sit. As you gaze at your gifts, these symbols and what you have been told by the giver, do these have any meaning for you regarding something that has or is happening in your life right now? Describe how these gifts can be applied to your life in the present.
Take a deep breath in and slowly release it. Another and another, opening your eyes on the third exhale. How will you apply this new knowledge to your life’s journey.
This exercise may be one that you want to jot down what or who you meet and the gift they’ve given you along with the reason and meaning. It will add a little food for thought when you have a few spare minutes to meditate on what you sensed.
Sue Thornton
Owner, Blue Heron Transitions
YOU CAN CO-CREATE YOUR OWN CIRCUMSTANCES
WORKING TOGETHER TO LEARN HOW TO FOLLOW YOUR OWN UNIIQUE WISDOM AND PATH OF SELF-DETERMINATION
eMail: Thorntonsue.sue@gmail.com
Telephone: (402) 202-8303
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